When I began medical school, I referred to any time spent doing related activities (studying, going to clinic, attending class, studying more) as "saving lives."
"Wish I could go out tonight, but I've got to go save lives."
"Yep, meeting with my preceptor this afternoon to save some lives."
The closer third year approaches, my attitude on this phrase is changing. First off, I'm not saving lives. Nowhere close. For example, yesterday in two hours with my preceptor I touched one patient. I did an eye exam on a normal 14yo AAM. Not only did I not even pretend to save that boy's life, I didn't even address his chief complaint.
Mostly though, I'm starting to see that in my contact with patients now and in my next year, saving lives is not my goal. I just don't want to kill anyone. If I actually manage to help somone, bonus, but I'm just hoping not to be the reason their heart/kidneys/lungs stop working.
So next time someone asks my what I'm doing, I am prepared to say "Trying not to kill anyone."
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An uncensored glimpse into the sights, sounds, and smells that is my life in medical school.
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